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Sunday
Apr012012

Sources: Donald Trump Now An Augusta National Member

Donald Trump, the New York real estate developer, reality television star, litigation hobbyist and occasional political pundit, was extended a membership to Augusta National Golf Club this fall, sources exclusively tell GeoffShackelford.com.

Trump first started telling confidants about his new membership not long after the exclusive home to the Masters opened for play in October, 2011. Anecdotal evidence of his membership surfaced soon thereafter. Golfers who encountered Trump at Doral Resort last month while playing his latest $150 million purchase reported that he discussed ways he could influence how the home of the Masters might be better now that he was a member.

“He told us he’d put fountains in the lakes on 15 and 16 for ambiance, claiming there’s too much silence when a guy is standing over a putt during the final round,” said Dave Pidgeon, 36, of Coral Springs, Florida. “Trump also said the club was missing out on a great chance for better aesthetics at the 13th green by raising the creek level. He compared the water movement in the brook to a sewer line he saw feeding into the Hudson.”

Another Doral guest was visiting from Munich, Germany, and eavesdropped as Trump, accompanied by a film crew, walked through the hotel lobby with an accompanying entourage. Detlef Hindenburg and wife Angela were heading for lunch when they listened to a discussion about decor, which Hindenburg later posted about on GolfClubAtlas.com. Though the Trump entourage's focus was on redecorating Doral’s lobby, Trump could not help but mention a recent trip to Augusta.

“These drapes are awful,” Hindenburg recalls Trump announcing, pointing to a pink-flamingo patterned set. “But this is nothing compared to Augusta’s clubhouse which, in all honesty, and I say this in the nicest way possible because I'm a member now, is just a tired dump. It’s termite infested. All those old clubs and photos and the paintings of dead guys on the walls makes you want to take a nap. I told Billy Payne, 'you’re fired' if you don’t do something to liven this place up.”

Hindenburg said he is sure the word “dump” was used because he recalls looking to his wife immediately following the comment and she mouthed the “D” word to him.

Blurry cell phone image captured by a reader of Donald Trump heading for the Bush Field terminal after landing in his jet (click to enlarge)The final piece of evidence confirming Trump’s membership surfaced after he was photographed by reader Green Blazer's cell phone camera when he spotted the mogul arriving at the Augusta’s Bush Field, where he is seen leaving his jet and wearing a green jacket (right).

Contacted to confirm whether the story of his membership or critical comments about the club were true, Trump declined comment.

Then he called back five minutes later.

“Hypothetically, if I were to say I was a member, wouldn’t that be a compliment to the club? I mean, it’s not like I’m a bad guy or a poor guy. Or God forbid, a woman.”

As for criticizing Bobby Jones’s dream course, Trump had a few nice things to say.

“I love all the azaleas and the flowering trees. Jones was a genius to bring that stuff in. I don’t think I’ve encountered a genius for the visual possibilities of flora and fauna like that, except maybe Steve Wynn. That’s a compliment to Jones, I assure you.”

Steve Ethun, press officer for Augusta National and The Masters, declined comment.

“We do not discuss membership-related matters, particularly on a Sunday and most definitely not on April 1st.”

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Reader Comments (46)

Please tell me this is an April Fool's joke.
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterPat
Credit for the first two paragraphs, but graph 3 was a bit too far even for The Donald. Maybe.
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterEric
Nice one Geoff!!
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterIrish Golf Nut
"better aesthetics at the 13th green by filling up the creek." Nice one.
Without the last sentence, you would have fooled thousands.
Half expected The Donald's coiffed bonce to be on the masthead.
He sounds like Caddyshack's Al Czervik (Rodney Dangerfield) :
«Oh, this your wife, huh? A lovely lady. Hey baby, you must've been something before electricity. »
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterPete Poulin
You had me until the fountains, ha-ha!
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterMacDuff
Happy April fools.
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterP. Diddy
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04.1.2012 | Unregistered Commenterrb
Well played!
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterScott W
Happy April 1, Shack. Had me for a minute.
04.1.2012 | Unregistered Commentersteve elling
I almost threw up until I realized the date.
I'd rather see a woman in before that egocentric jerk.
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterStanley Thompson
outstanding, geoff. i was screaming "nooooooo!!!" for a few seconds before i remembered the date.
04.1.2012 | Unregistered Commenterthusgone
I was going to comment...but Stanley Thompson already posted every word I planned to write. ;)
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterDanaLynn
You had me for three seconds. Excellent work!
Got me!
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterSkeptic
Fountains? I'm thinking a waterfall behind 12 green that extends to the back of 13 tee. Damn the creek and wrap the wide moat all the way to around to the back of 11 green. This'll turn 12 into the island green it was always meant to be! It'll also eliminate the annoying 'silence' on 13 tee while reducing bird sounds/ shadows during backswings. Finally, the extra pondage will add some much needed challenge to the benign 11th hole.

;)
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterDsl
Coulda been more subtle, but I guess it wouldn't have been Donaldian. Thanks.
04.1.2012 | Unregistered Commenter3foot1
Hmmmmmmmmmmmm .........how 'bout "Trump National at Augusta"? Think of the reciprocities with the other "great" Trump clubs throughout the world! They'll love The Donald at ANGC!

Another notch on his Club Championship Belt!

Can't you hear The Donald now........"I have some great marketing ideas that will really allow us to expand the brand of the club. Not just locally, or regionally, but world-wide. Why, I think by implementing a few of my ideas we can take this place global!"

NOT!!!
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterTheProfromDover
All great April Fool's jokes have a shred of truth. The Donald's an apprentice member.
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterAverage Golfer
Got me too. Very good.
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterGreg
Great one Jeff. Almost as good as my 100 mph curveball!
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterSidd Finch
Fabulous! Thanks for starting my day with so much laughter Geoff. Happy Feast of Fools to one and all.......
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterLarry Petrillo
Wow, do I feel like an idiot!
Good one Geoff
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterBrad
"A" for effort.
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterPHK
Geoff--Well played..LOL LOL
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterM. Storm
April Fool alarm went off as soon as the word "fountain" was used. Now I will finish the piece and come back to read the comments.
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterF. X. Flinn
The Donald has promised a top-notch club renamed TPC at Azalea Gardens!
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterJonathan
Didn't fool me for a minute. The boffins of Augusta would never allow such a loud-mouth, grandstanding fool to grace those noble fairways.
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterJoey
You had me until, "sources exclusively tell GeoffShackelford.com."
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterBob
They DESERVE each other.
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterHuh?
Had me until I read the improvements the new member wanted.

Nonetheless I like Tommy's photoshop for the Donald in a green jacket
04.1.2012 | Unregistered Commenterjstiles
At first glance, Golf is definitely hurting when you hear Augusta National is giving Trump membership. But having read through it half way and adding fountains to 16. That was suspiciously funny.
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterJohn Bautista
I'm not as smart as some of the commenters above. Given who Trump is, you had me all the way to the punchline. Brilliant piece of writing.
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterBill Rand
Great fun, Geoff.
Loved the Steve Wynn Bob Jones 'compliment' especially. :)
04.1.2012 | Unregistered Commenterdbh
I'm with you, Bill. Reading how sharp most the others here were makes me worry about my own early cognition issues. Then again, after the Republican primary season and knowing The Donald as we do, the absurd has become credible.
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterPasaplayer
What's wrong with The Donald being extended a membership offer? So many on this site have said he's "good for the game." I think I can say without much doubt that Martha Burk has a better chance at membership at ANGC than The Donald. They are smarter than that.
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterCarter
Article of the Year.
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterStreaky Putter
Can't wait to see the waterfalls. Can he get them done by next week?
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterTLB
Had me for 2 seconds Geoff. Tommy used an old photo. Trump upgraded his jet last year from that old 727 to a new 757.
04.1.2012 | Unregistered CommenterJoel

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